Miles Between Us

The last two weeks have been exhausting. There have been moments of both good exhaustion and bad. But the common denominator is the same...we are worn out!

While I was at camp, Sara drove to Nashville, to fly to Baltimore to drive to a wedding weekend (for one of her relatives) in Pennsylvania. That same week we found out her grandmother passed away. So she made plans to drive back to Baltimore and fly to Tulsa, Oklahoma to drive east to Muskogee for the funeral. I came back from camp making plans to drive to St. Louis on Monday to fly to Tulsa, Oklahoma to drive to Muskogee to meet Sara for the funeral. Then Sunday morning before I was to leave on Monday I got a call that my grandpa had a massive stroke and he wasn't expected to live. He was 92 but the crazy thing was he was out helping build a fence the day before. My aunt and uncle had been building an apartment on their property for him and they were about two weeks from completing it and moving him in. He was so looking forward to that day!

I still left for Oklahoma on Monday. My grandfather passed away late Monday afternoon. We stayed in Oklahoma for a few days and attended the funeral for Mildred Marie Collier Siner on Wednesday. On Thursday we drove back to Tulsa and flew in to Dallas Love Field. We then drove to Rockwall on the east side of Dallas, where my aunt and uncle live, to meet my family. We did his funeral on Friday which was pretty special. He served in the military (Army Air Core) and so some men from the army were there at his burial to honor him and present a flag to my dad on behalf of the United States of America. We then stayed the weekend sorting through all of his belongings. We couldn't get a flight home until Tuesday initially, but at the last minute were able to get one on Monday. Late Sunday night we decided we would drive grandpa's old '97 Buick Century home. So, on Monday Sara drove to the airport to fly from Dallas to St. Louis to pick up our truck that I had driven there at the beginning of the week in order to now drive the 3 hours home to Paducah. I left early that morning to drive the 10 hours from Dallas to Paducah and got home Monday evening. We crashed pretty much all day on Tuesday as the weight of everything settled upon us.

I'm feeling tired again just typing all of that out. We covered quite a few miles between us the last two weeks both physically and emotionally. I'd prefer not to have to do anything like that again in the near future or the distant one for that matter. But in all of it I'm reminded that we are called to live a certain way in this world and that kind of life is possible because Mildred and Richard daily showed us the way...

Remembering Never to Forget Grandpa

What a crazy last week! It's hard to imagine it being much crazier but I'm sure it's always possible. You expect to lose grandparents at some point but I never thought Sara and I would each lose one at the same time. I will probably write more about this over time but here is what I was able to share at my grandpa's funeral...


READ Psalm 24:1-6

I feel like I shouldn’t begin without greeting and hugging each of you because that’s how grandpa would have done it. But I guess we’ll have to save it for afterward. Just two short years ago I stood in this same place, in the same week and shared how we would forever remember grandma or to many of you Dorothy (Dot) Darling. And now in some ways what seems like just a few days later I want to share a few things about Richard (Dick) Darling or grandpa, I want to remember never to forget.

I use that phrase “remember never to forget” on purpose. I have a hard time remembering things. At times it seems like I have one of the worst memories in the world. I forget items on the grocery list. I forget where I last placed my keys. Sometimes I can’t remember people’s names. At times I forget to complete my “honey-do” list. Other times I can even forget where I parked my car. It can become especially frustrating when I want to remember things from earlier in life.

Yesterday we sat around and shared stories involving grandpa. As others shared I was reminded of my own memories because with grandpa there was a lot to remember. I remember quick trips to the store…a pantry full of sweets and cookies. I remember watching him work in the yard, and on the house, and on anything else he could get his hands on. He was always working away at something. He was hardly ever standing still. I remember stories upon stories. Richard was a great story-teller and never afraid to tell stories on himself. I remember how he loved grandma…how he was so sweet to her whatever the situation. I remember that in many ways Grandpa was an unintentional babe-magnet. He was a looker when he was young but he only got more adorable with age. Everybody thought so and he was always surrounded by a group of people. He also made a positive impression on everyone he met. On Wednesday I was talking with my brother-in-law about coming down here for the funeral and he mentioned that he remembered Richard after meeting him five years ago at our wedding and that in that short time positively impacted his life. That was grandpa!

I want to “remember never to forget.” I have to be intentional about what I remember or else something will slip my mind. Because of that I’m reminded about Israel as God’s people. God constantly called them to “remember not to forget” because it was easy for them to become a forgetful people. He wanted them to remember how he had delivered them from slavery, from the hand of the Egyptians. To remember that it was by his power alone that they were where and who they were. To remember how he had forever changed their lives. They were intentional about remembering through their telling of stories, through their continual sharing of memories. It was these memories, these stories that pointed them to, and reminded them of, the work God was doing in their lives.

Stories about grandma and grandpa are part of what will accomplish that in my life. They remind me of how God has worked before me, through me and will continue to work long after me. And it is stories of the way he lived that I believe will continue to shape me. One of the many things I love and admire about grandpa was his desire to greet everyone. He was passionate about making people feel welcome and he took that role in the body of Christ seriously. Richard also never knew a stranger! He befriended all people no matter the age, race, or economic status…his neighbors, those who worked in the offices/stores he visited, and every person that entered one of the doors of this building. I remember two years ago at grandma’s visitation one of the waitresses at the local IHOP came to comfort grandpa because of the impact he had on her throughout the many times they ate in her restaurant. That’s a testimony to who he was and how he lived. One day when my wife and I have kids of our own, those are the things I want them to know and remember not to forget about their great grandpa!

READ 2 Corinthians 4:13-5:10

I don’t think grandpa is groaning anymore and I’m pretty confident he’s enjoying his new clothes! He is away from the body, but at home with the Lord.

I just ask one more thing…if you have ever received a smile, a handshake, and a hug of welcome from Richard Darling would you please stand and remain standing as I conclude… (for those of you reading...close to two hundred people were in attendance and they all stood up!)

Grandpa…thank you for the life you lived. Thank you for how you loved all people, how you loved your family, and how you loved grandma. Thank you for the legacy you leave for all who come behind you. You may have changed locations but I’m sure we know where to expect you…at the “doors” to God’s presence welcoming all who enter. And I look forward to the smile, handshake and hug of welcome I will receive whenever my time comes to join you in the presence of God.

Camp

What a crazy week! If only all the campers knew everything that goes into making Superweek what it is...

We leave in the morning for South Carolina. Twenty-nine of us. It should be a great time. I have really enjoyed it the last few years. But, man is it exhausting! Pray for us this next week. I hope it can be meaningful for all who attend.

Palmetto Bible Camp here we come!